Reality is Setting in

I have been exposed a couple of times to the situation that's going on with Hubby and S living at Hubby's house with her daughter and with our son. Our son is staying with me this week because his head got split open on Saturday and we want him to stay in a calm environment that it can heal.

Before I start, I love Hubby very much. I always have no matter what people say, think or do nor what my actions may have been. What I am also about to say has nothing to do with the fact that Hubby and S are a "couple" (It might somewhere down the road but that's not what's driving it).

I have heard very little (at least anything plausible) about this girl and have watched a bit from a distance to see if I can see what Hubby sees. . .still looking. . .sorry. She's nice and pretty and has a decent car and job. Bout it. She also has a child that she has absolutely no control over who is mouthy, disrespectful to adults and spoiled. I would say that about any child who acted that way, it's nothing personal. I worked in daycare as a teacher for a while and love kids. When I go drop or pick up my son, I talk to all the kids there which some of them are like (we will call her A) A. Some of the teachers have a really hard time dealing with these kids because they railroad all over them because they know what buttons to push and how far to go. It's all a game and as the old saying goes. . . ."the apple doesn't fall far from the tree". Most kids are the way they are because of their parents. My daughter is a spitting image of me. Our son is a spitting image of his dad with a little of me mixed in there. See? Apples.

Respect is a big thing to me. For a while lately I have not respected myself enough to take care of myself. Respecting another individual for who they are is an even bigger deal to me. I may not know you very well but your actions will dictate some of that. It's hard for me to have respect for someone who cannot control their child after being basically a single parent and then have someone that you've only know for a month step in and be that father figure. Not fair to that child, definitely a convenience to her, not fair to our son and wearing Hubby out (sorry but you can see it).

Our own son is a handful. It's taken a lot of hard work from BOTH of us to get him to where he is today. Hubby told me not too long ago that our son doesn't listen to me at all. Not true. This whole week, we have compromised, been given choices and I have not allowed him to be in control of the situation that he wants to create if the time is not appropriate (i.e. bed, shower, eating, etc.) Hubby wants no more children yet is taking on another, can hardly control her child and then deal with ours who is so messed up in the head right now because of what's going on, what is going to happen?

Hubby told me last night that he wants to take all of them down to our special place. That freaked me out. Our son is enough to watch but two kids that don't mind that feed off of one another? What if something happens and one of them gets hurt? Christ! I was just up the hill when his head got cut what if they are 500 miles away? This is a huge concern for me. I already know that this is all going to cause a mega fight. Words will be exchanged, Hubby will think that I am fucking with his happiness and that all I care about is me. None of that is true. I want to make sure that our son will be in a safe environment where he is well taken care of. This is all bugging the crap out of me and all I want to do is talk to Hubby alone about this because this is our issue. I just wish we could go somewhere and talk alone and get some of this crap out. . . . .God I hope a big fight doesn't start.