Let me explain to you the logistics of our Thanksgiving arrangements in Issy's home. In the past, Steve cooked the food up at the in law's house. We would go up there and eat, come back home and I would travel to my parents house without hubby as he can't stand my family. He would sit at home for a few and then go to his close friend's house to have food there and they would come back to our house for a night of drunkenness. I would come home and all was well.
This year however, the in law's will be taking the little one to Branson. Sister in law will be leaving on Saturday to go to her parents house; why she isn't going on Thursday, I do not know. I will be going to my parents as usual and hubby will be all alone at the house for Thanksgiving. He is looking totally forward to it. He is wanting to spend some quality time alone, playing a video game and snacking and drinking. . . . alone. I told him (as I have every year) that he is invited to go with us. He says "thank you" but he will pass.
Try to follow here. . .
Sister in law comes down on Saturday this past weekend. Hubby is out with the new car probably trolling for pussy no doubt. I tell her to stay so that maybe she'll say or do something that would explain her awkward and disturbing behavior. She sits with me and says "Guess what Mom said to me the other day?" I haven't a clue. . . what? "Well with you being gone and them going to Branson, I should cook a turkey for your hubby! Can you believe that?" On the outside I just stare at here like I can't believe you are telling me this. On the inside I'm saying "You cook a damn turkey for my man and that bird will be shoved so far up your ass, you won't have to eat for a week!" I still didn't know what to say to her. I knew that as soon as I saw hubby I would tell him.
The next day, I tell hubby what was said and what type of dog and pony show we are going to have to be privy to. He gets irate and I don't blame him. His boss sends us a turkey every year. We usually cook it sometime in between Thanksgiving and Christmas. We invite all of our friends over for our own pseudo "Thanksgiving/Turkey Dinner" to share how much our friends mean to us. Knowing that he thought sister in law was going to be moving in on my territory, wasn't going to fly with him and I was glad for it.
Well, Thanksgiving is only a few days away and I'm just going to sit back and see how many people can fuck up the holidays. I know I won't be one of them!
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5 comments:
She offers to clean your house, do your laundry, take care of your man, and cook a turkey? That shameful bitch!
You know, if you played this right you could have a nice little maid there to take care of everything. Then you'd only have to give it up to hubby every now and then when he wanted a change (Bw-ha-ha!).
I'll hold her down, you go get the bird....
Could she be anymore psycho? Your SIL and my SIL should get together. They would make great friends.
Hahahaha! That's the spirit, Issy. I don't think I've ever had a holiday season that has not been FUBAR.
i'm super stressed just reading YOUR issues.
Oh El. Don't fret. I'll try to make the holidays a little more laid back for everyone!
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