1988

I came across an old diary about a month ago and have been reading it off and on. This particular entry was what I wrote during a flashback when I was in between houses and didn't know what was going to happen to me:

"I see two red eyes and long permed hair. I see nothing but insanity and black. I can't look into the mirror without being scared of what I see. Now I see nothing. My hands and whole body is shaking. Now I see myself taking lots of pills and dying. Now I see people having orgies without a purpose. My heart is going too fast and it's about to leave my body. My dog is dead. My cousin has died. I'm dead. People around me are dead. I feel so empty inside. I cry for no reason and I must be possessed. Im breathing too fast. This isn't me but I don't know who this is. Please tell me who you are and then leave me. I'm insane and out of control. I'm scared for myself but help has come too late. I walk around and don't know where I'm going. I guess I really am dead."

December 7, 1988