Issy's New Year's Eve

Hubby and I decided to go out for New Year's this year. Every year for the past 8 years we have had massive bonfire and everyone has gotten stinking drunk including us. I usually fall down at least 3 times and have unexplained bruises from my drunken frolic in the lower field in the dark. One year I was climbing on top of a brush pile when my foot got stuck in between some branches and my leg wouldn't move. I fell backwards with my foot still stuck and landed on my back on a roll of barbed wire. I woke up the next morning with a huge bruise on my back and just couldn't figure out how that got there! With years of all of that hoosier excitement, how could I even dream of doing something sane?

Well I did. Hubby and I made reservations at a hotel that was 5 miles from the casino that we go to about once a year. They had a package deal for New Year's and the price was decent so we made our plans. Hotel was nice (Doubletree) and our room was VERY small. . . smelled funky too. We had a smoking room because hubby smokes and it smelled like a hooker had a relay race going on. It smelled like ass and smoke. . . what a sick combination.

We went down to the "lounge" and had a few drinks and appetizers before getting ready to go to the casino. We went back to the room where both of us got dressed and ready to go. I wore a black lace, sleeveless dress that came a few inches above my knee and was somewhat low cut in the bust area. The lace had a flesh colored underlay underneath it and when matched with the heels that I was wearing, I must say that I looked like a million bucks! Off to the casino we went. . . .

Upon our arrival at the casino, both of us needed new cards. We went through the process and headed to the casino itself through the turn style where they check your casino card with your drivers licence. I had a nice woman who was checking me through until flaming homosexual security man got mixed up in the works. As she is checking me, this fruitcake came over and dialog is as follows:

"You can't let her in"
Me - "Why not"
"They won't let her at the tables dressed like that"
Nice Lady - "What's wrong with how she's dressed?"
"Just trust me, they won't let her at the tables but if you want to try then by all means, try"
Me - "I don't understand what's wrong with how I'm dressed"
"It's the slip"
Me - "What slip? I don't have one of those on! I have on a bra and underwear if you want to see that"
"Ma'am, would you like to leave or just go into the casino?"
Me - "You just told me that I couldn't go in because of the way I'm dressed!"
"Well do whatever you want but don't say I didn't warn you"

Hubby had already gone through before me and said that when he turned around and saw this clown questioning me that my face was in such a rage that he had to exit and go back through to see what was wrong. He asked the security homo what the problem was and said that the man would not look him in the eye at all. Hubby said that it's been a long time since he's seen me that angry in a long time. And it didn't help that I had had a shot of Crown before we hit the casino. Fag boy better be damn glad that the Crown wasn't talking! My mom would have put her 6" stiletto right up his ball sack if he had talked to her like that but I think I was too stunned to react in a dignified manner.

We gambled at the bar, laughed, drank and had a great time. I had 4 women throughout the course of the night tell me what a pretty dress I had on and how cute I looked in at. And guys, ladies are the worst and harshest critics. If you look like a whore in a dress, you will know it from a female before you know it from a male. When we were done at the casino, we went looking for our shuttle to take us back to the hotel. Nowhere to be found which would have been next to impossible with all of the bedlam that was taking place in front of the casino. I have never seen so many people, cars and lights. It was ridiculous! Finally a cabbie picked us up and off we went.

We were driving with this grotesque man as our driver in the dark through a park when he decides to cut the cheese in the cab. Then he blames it on someone hitting a deer. Are you for fucking real dude? You just crapped yourself and can't come up with anything better than "Oh someone musta hit a deer". What a freak.

We got back to the hotel and all was well. We went to our room, turned on the tv, called some friends to wish them a happy new year and rang in the new year together just the two of us. It was a comical start to a hopefully lighthearted 2008.